I think it is interesting how so many Christians have completely gotten away from the idea of a Sabbath. Sure, we go to church and worship on Sunday (or Saturday in our case), but life seems to resume pretty quickly once we walk out the door. God obviously knew that we would need a day every single week to rest and spend some time quieting ourselves and listening to him. So even though I may not be reserving an entire day, I've got at least three hours that I'm going to get the most out of by slowing down for one night.
I am working on being more joyful. I am a coach/team lead for the early childhood ministry volunteers at my church and this morning before services all of the volunteers went around and shared any goal(s) that they had for 2013. I mentioned my goal of trying to find more joy in the day to day. Later in the morning, one of the volunteers told me she'd be praying for me in my quest for joy and I was so thankful. I love being part of a community and team that prays for each other through all that life throws at us.
I was able to bask in quite a bit of joy this evening. We frequently have family dance parties in the evening that consist of me or James finding random songs on You Tube or Vevo that we think the kids will enjoy dancing to. Tonight, James was playing the horribly out of tune guitar that we got our daughter for Christmas and a couple of the strums reminded me of the song Sharp Hint of New Tears by Dashboard Confessional. The song ended up getting stuck in my head and the only way to get a song unstuck is to listen to it. So we threw it on for the kids and they started to do some wonderful interpretive dances. That sparked a few other Dashboard songs, like Stolen and Don't Wait. I snuggled up next to James on the couch and we just watched the three of them dance to songs that spoke to me during a very empty time in my life and I was filled with joy.
All of those flashback songs reminded me of a "note" that I put on Facebook back in 2009. It was kind of amusing to go back and read that and see how much I've changed in just under four years. I guess motherhood will do that to you! I went through the soundtrack of my life and thought I'd share it again on here. (Please don't judge me by past music choices....some of them were painfully bad, but a part of my life none the less.) Enjoy a blast from my past!
So I was sitting at home tonight while James was at work and Rory was asleep just listening to some songs that I haven't listened to forever and I was immediately taken back to moments in my life that I remember listening to them so I started to make a list of some of them and it got a bit long - but here are songs that would be played if anyone ever made a movie about my life
Bon Jovi – You Give Love a Bad Name:
I distinctly remember hearing this song play on the Juke Box (with my dollar I might add) at the Red Barn Resort in Sauk Center one summer whilst playing pool with my sister and a new summertime friend singing our lungs out. I must have been eight or nine.
Color Me Badd – I Wanna Sex You Up:
Seriously, what was a girl of ten young years doing listening to a song like this??? I remember blaring this on our new cd player in our living room at our house on Jefferson Street with my sisters (If I was 10, that means Laura was 7, making it even more wrong)
New Kids on the Block – Step by Step
I remember watching this video on a countdown while hanging out with my mom at work on a Saturday – we didn’t have cable at home, but she did at work, so we would go with her to work on Saturday mostly to watch MTV/VH1
Ru Paul – Supermodel:
I asked James if he knew whatever happened to RuPaul the other day….no luck. Anyway – I got my very first discman for Christmas when I was in 7th grade and I got two CDs with it – MTV Party to Go 4 (what the crap?) and Garth Brooks – In Pieces. I remember sitting in the small gym at NUJHS in costume for Lil Abner waiting between scenes and just listening to Supermodel over and over - very strange
Boyz II Men – Water Runs Dry:
I remember listening to this song very loudly in the basement bathroom at our first house in Farmtown. Pretty sure I was getting ready for a dance where I would undoubtedly have stood around awkwardly waiting for someone to ask me to dance…..little did I know that I would keep waiting forever, pretty sure the first time and really the only time someone ever asked me to dance (other than Prom/Weddings, and then it doesn’t count cause you are with a date) was when I went to visit my sister Jenny at college when she was a freshman (making me a sophomore in high school) and we went to some lame-o college dance cause she liked some boy that was there and one of his friends asked me to dance to some country song, I think by John Michael Montgomery…..that one got a bit long, sorry
Light the Fire (Camp Song):
Sky Ranch in the Rocky Mountains of Colorado – evening worship after a long day of hiking and taking in God’s amazing creation – the first time I truly felt the Holy Spirit moving in me and was brought to tears of joy because of God’s amazing love
Better than Ezra – Desperately Wanting:
Riding with an older girl from my summer softball team – she gave me a ride to a softball game and she was totally alternative and I thought she was awesome – she was listening to the 93.7 – The EGDE (best radio station ever I think) – I was new to the metro area and had never heard it before and I was immediately hooked to the station and the music on it
The Cardigans – Love Fool
I remember listening to this in my bedroom on a school night – it was on in the background when a friend called me and told me she was having a rough night because her dad had passed away – I was in 8th grade and had no idea what to say, but I felt very sad for her – I was sitting in this awesome red/orange chair that I still have (only painted) in our basement
NIN – The Perfect Drug
I remember the first time I heard this song I was with my boy obsession for most of high school – I swear there were so many tears shed over him that you could have easily filled a bathtub – I was riding around with him like we often did – we always hung out in his car, just drove around or sat in parking lots and listened to music and talked – anyway, we were turning from 160th onto Highway 3 when it came on the radio and he cranked it and told me how awesome the song was. I of course being my over analytical self read too much into it and thought that was his way of telling me that I was his perfect drug, when really, he just liked the song…..not me, well, not like that anyway…..at least not then, maybe not ever, but we did make out a couple of times, and then he told me he wasn’t ready for a relationship, so I thought that meant he didn’t want to make out with me anymore, so I started ignoring him – months later I would find out that he did like me, only I completely ruined that because I started dating someone else who he really wasn’t a fan of.
Backstreet Boys – All I Have to Give
During my one and only actual very short lived relationship during high school - Driving down Pilot Knob he put on this song and I thought it was the bees knees. He always had the perfect song for the moment – it was amazing. We went to prom together our Junior year and that is all I can think of when I hear K-Ci and JoJo – All My Life. I was ridiculous in high school and had no idea what I was doing and completely messed that one up – but we became friends again after high school.
N'SYNC - Tearin Up My Heart
Laura and I went out driving together shortly after I got my license and this song came on the radio - we got so excited and just cranked it up and sang along at the top of our lungs and then proceeded to talk about how good looking Lance Bass and Justin Timberlake were and how their voices made us melt......
Cake – The Distance
Sticking with the prom theme – senior year prom I went with one of my good friends – I remember riding with him to The Wilds in Prior Lake after grand march and listening to this song in his mom’s Buick with the volume controls on the steering wheel. Steve is one of the bestest guys you’ll ever find – great friend and sarcastic to the bone. I remember many late nights hanging out with him and some other friends in his parent’s basement just laughing our behinds off. I know I did something to damage that relationship – not sure of the details, but it makes me sad, but I can’t say I’ve ever really done anything to keep in touch cause I pretty much suck at that. I do miss the fun had.
Metallica – Enter Sandman
Also prom with a couple of friends dancing ridiculously and just having a good time – we’ve had more fun together than I think I’ve ever had with anyone outside of my family
Shout to the Lord:
Benson Bunker Field House, NDSU, worshiping at The River on a Friday night with my Campus Crusade buddies – Holy Spirit moved me to tears – gave my life to Christ that night. I definitely got lost after leaving Moorhead and transferring to Mankato and not finding a Christian organization like Campus Crusade there – I tried so hard to find somewhere to belong but it just never happened and I turned to the world. I often wonder how different my life would be if I had stayed at Moorhead State surrounded by people who loved God – I know I wouldn’t have nearly as many emotional scars – but I also wouldn’t be where I am today and I am very happy with that
Candlebox – Far Behind
This is not a good memory – but a memory none the less. Sitting in a dorm room at St. Olaf feeling sick to my stomach because the biggest scum bag of scum bags (my “boyfriend’ and apparently a lot of other girl’s) had stolen something from me that I would never be able to get back and drastically changed the course of my life for the next five years
Lifehouse – Simon/Breathing/Somewhere in Between/Everything
Sitting in my dorm room at Mankato at the end of the hall – a Friday night – laying on the floor on my back with my head against my dresser with my stereo on top under my loft with these songs blaring on repeat – trying to get through another lonely night – college really sucks when you don’t drink and don’t have a boyfriend and everyone else you know does
Dashboard Confessional – Again I Go Unnoticed
Saturday morning in the same dorm room in Mankato – perhaps even the morning after the night described above – who knows really. Anywhoo, I heard this song coming through my heat register from the room above me and I was completely drawn in – it seriously was like my “emotions” coming out in a song – I ran upstairs and knocked on the door to find out what it was because I had no idea – the guys was totally creeped out I’m sure – but I am so happy – I love Dashboard
Puddle of Mudd – Blurry
Springtime at Mankato – I was sitting under a tree doing homework listening to this on my discman – thinking my life was going to be better now that I had found a boyfriend who also liked this song…..could I have been more wrong?
Good Charlotte – Change
The worst Halloween ever (funny how just six years later I had the best day/Halloween of my life) I had just gotten back to my dorm room in Bemidji after having the worst panic attack of my life after I decided to go sit outside for like twenty minutes in the cold with no jacket to see if anyone (including my boyfriend from above song) would notice that I was gone – no one did. I put this song on and crawled up in my bed and cried like I’ve never cried before. Boy am I glad I’m not that person anymore.
Cary Brothers – Blue Eyes
The turning point – so I had just been on a few dates with this fantabulous guy named James – I thought he was the best thing since sliced bread – he called me up one night after I had gotten home from work and asked if he could stop by quickly – he stopped by and dropped off a belated birthday present because we hadn’t gone out yet when it was my birthday but he still wanted to get me something – one of those things was the soundtrack to Garden State – we had seen the movie together and he just wanted to see me even though he couldn’t stay long – I think I listened to this CD, specifically Blue Eyes over and over all night long with a big grin on my face
Damien Rice – Cannonball/Volcano and others
Another date with this James fella – we ended up stopping at Cheapo in St. Paul and I picked up a couple of CDs – Damien Rice – O and Jimmy Eat World – Bleed American. We drove around in my Altima with the windows down and Damien Rice blaring and I knew that I was in love
The Killers – Andy You’re a Star
Driving down highway 61 between Grand Marais and Duluth somewhere this song was on and I was driving and I looked over at James and he was sound asleep – for the first time in my life I felt a sense of completeness and security
My Chemical Romance – Helena
My first night as a wife driving down the strip in Las Vegas in a convertible with the top down with the love of my life right next to me and the rest of our life together ahead of us – all I really need to say :o)
Kenny Bristol – Jesus Paid it All
A Sunday morning a month or so before I had Rory I remember just closing my eyes and singing and the tears just falling because she started moving around and I just felt so full of love
Lullaby Land – Extractor Fan
Many, many nights I would listen to this blaring in our bedroom with Rory finally asleep in the bassinet next to our bed – I don’t know what we would have done without this track – it kept us sane. James and I would always joke about this being our favorite song.
Matt Nathanson – Still
I listened to this driving home from class last Tuesday after presenting our business plan and finally feeling a sense of relief. I was driving down 62 with my windows open even though it was a little bit cold - I just felt perfect peace and happiness and started to remember just how much I love music and the feelings, memories and emotions that it evokes within me. It really is my drug of choice.
Bon Jovi – You Give Love a Bad Name:
I distinctly remember hearing this song play on the Juke Box (with my dollar I might add) at the Red Barn Resort in Sauk Center one summer whilst playing pool with my sister and a new summertime friend singing our lungs out. I must have been eight or nine.
Color Me Badd – I Wanna Sex You Up:
Seriously, what was a girl of ten young years doing listening to a song like this??? I remember blaring this on our new cd player in our living room at our house on Jefferson Street with my sisters (If I was 10, that means Laura was 7, making it even more wrong)
New Kids on the Block – Step by Step
I remember watching this video on a countdown while hanging out with my mom at work on a Saturday – we didn’t have cable at home, but she did at work, so we would go with her to work on Saturday mostly to watch MTV/VH1
Ru Paul – Supermodel:
I asked James if he knew whatever happened to RuPaul the other day….no luck. Anyway – I got my very first discman for Christmas when I was in 7th grade and I got two CDs with it – MTV Party to Go 4 (what the crap?) and Garth Brooks – In Pieces. I remember sitting in the small gym at NUJHS in costume for Lil Abner waiting between scenes and just listening to Supermodel over and over - very strange
Boyz II Men – Water Runs Dry:
I remember listening to this song very loudly in the basement bathroom at our first house in Farmtown. Pretty sure I was getting ready for a dance where I would undoubtedly have stood around awkwardly waiting for someone to ask me to dance…..little did I know that I would keep waiting forever, pretty sure the first time and really the only time someone ever asked me to dance (other than Prom/Weddings, and then it doesn’t count cause you are with a date) was when I went to visit my sister Jenny at college when she was a freshman (making me a sophomore in high school) and we went to some lame-o college dance cause she liked some boy that was there and one of his friends asked me to dance to some country song, I think by John Michael Montgomery…..that one got a bit long, sorry
Light the Fire (Camp Song):
Sky Ranch in the Rocky Mountains of Colorado – evening worship after a long day of hiking and taking in God’s amazing creation – the first time I truly felt the Holy Spirit moving in me and was brought to tears of joy because of God’s amazing love
Better than Ezra – Desperately Wanting:
Riding with an older girl from my summer softball team – she gave me a ride to a softball game and she was totally alternative and I thought she was awesome – she was listening to the 93.7 – The EGDE (best radio station ever I think) – I was new to the metro area and had never heard it before and I was immediately hooked to the station and the music on it
The Cardigans – Love Fool
I remember listening to this in my bedroom on a school night – it was on in the background when a friend called me and told me she was having a rough night because her dad had passed away – I was in 8th grade and had no idea what to say, but I felt very sad for her – I was sitting in this awesome red/orange chair that I still have (only painted) in our basement
NIN – The Perfect Drug
I remember the first time I heard this song I was with my boy obsession for most of high school – I swear there were so many tears shed over him that you could have easily filled a bathtub – I was riding around with him like we often did – we always hung out in his car, just drove around or sat in parking lots and listened to music and talked – anyway, we were turning from 160th onto Highway 3 when it came on the radio and he cranked it and told me how awesome the song was. I of course being my over analytical self read too much into it and thought that was his way of telling me that I was his perfect drug, when really, he just liked the song…..not me, well, not like that anyway…..at least not then, maybe not ever, but we did make out a couple of times, and then he told me he wasn’t ready for a relationship, so I thought that meant he didn’t want to make out with me anymore, so I started ignoring him – months later I would find out that he did like me, only I completely ruined that because I started dating someone else who he really wasn’t a fan of.
Backstreet Boys – All I Have to Give
During my one and only actual very short lived relationship during high school - Driving down Pilot Knob he put on this song and I thought it was the bees knees. He always had the perfect song for the moment – it was amazing. We went to prom together our Junior year and that is all I can think of when I hear K-Ci and JoJo – All My Life. I was ridiculous in high school and had no idea what I was doing and completely messed that one up – but we became friends again after high school.
N'SYNC - Tearin Up My Heart
Laura and I went out driving together shortly after I got my license and this song came on the radio - we got so excited and just cranked it up and sang along at the top of our lungs and then proceeded to talk about how good looking Lance Bass and Justin Timberlake were and how their voices made us melt......
Cake – The Distance
Sticking with the prom theme – senior year prom I went with one of my good friends – I remember riding with him to The Wilds in Prior Lake after grand march and listening to this song in his mom’s Buick with the volume controls on the steering wheel. Steve is one of the bestest guys you’ll ever find – great friend and sarcastic to the bone. I remember many late nights hanging out with him and some other friends in his parent’s basement just laughing our behinds off. I know I did something to damage that relationship – not sure of the details, but it makes me sad, but I can’t say I’ve ever really done anything to keep in touch cause I pretty much suck at that. I do miss the fun had.
Metallica – Enter Sandman
Also prom with a couple of friends dancing ridiculously and just having a good time – we’ve had more fun together than I think I’ve ever had with anyone outside of my family
Shout to the Lord:
Benson Bunker Field House, NDSU, worshiping at The River on a Friday night with my Campus Crusade buddies – Holy Spirit moved me to tears – gave my life to Christ that night. I definitely got lost after leaving Moorhead and transferring to Mankato and not finding a Christian organization like Campus Crusade there – I tried so hard to find somewhere to belong but it just never happened and I turned to the world. I often wonder how different my life would be if I had stayed at Moorhead State surrounded by people who loved God – I know I wouldn’t have nearly as many emotional scars – but I also wouldn’t be where I am today and I am very happy with that
Candlebox – Far Behind
This is not a good memory – but a memory none the less. Sitting in a dorm room at St. Olaf feeling sick to my stomach because the biggest scum bag of scum bags (my “boyfriend’ and apparently a lot of other girl’s) had stolen something from me that I would never be able to get back and drastically changed the course of my life for the next five years
Lifehouse – Simon/Breathing/Somewhere in Between/Everything
Sitting in my dorm room at Mankato at the end of the hall – a Friday night – laying on the floor on my back with my head against my dresser with my stereo on top under my loft with these songs blaring on repeat – trying to get through another lonely night – college really sucks when you don’t drink and don’t have a boyfriend and everyone else you know does
Dashboard Confessional – Again I Go Unnoticed
Saturday morning in the same dorm room in Mankato – perhaps even the morning after the night described above – who knows really. Anywhoo, I heard this song coming through my heat register from the room above me and I was completely drawn in – it seriously was like my “emotions” coming out in a song – I ran upstairs and knocked on the door to find out what it was because I had no idea – the guys was totally creeped out I’m sure – but I am so happy – I love Dashboard
Puddle of Mudd – Blurry
Springtime at Mankato – I was sitting under a tree doing homework listening to this on my discman – thinking my life was going to be better now that I had found a boyfriend who also liked this song…..could I have been more wrong?
Good Charlotte – Change
The worst Halloween ever (funny how just six years later I had the best day/Halloween of my life) I had just gotten back to my dorm room in Bemidji after having the worst panic attack of my life after I decided to go sit outside for like twenty minutes in the cold with no jacket to see if anyone (including my boyfriend from above song) would notice that I was gone – no one did. I put this song on and crawled up in my bed and cried like I’ve never cried before. Boy am I glad I’m not that person anymore.
Cary Brothers – Blue Eyes
The turning point – so I had just been on a few dates with this fantabulous guy named James – I thought he was the best thing since sliced bread – he called me up one night after I had gotten home from work and asked if he could stop by quickly – he stopped by and dropped off a belated birthday present because we hadn’t gone out yet when it was my birthday but he still wanted to get me something – one of those things was the soundtrack to Garden State – we had seen the movie together and he just wanted to see me even though he couldn’t stay long – I think I listened to this CD, specifically Blue Eyes over and over all night long with a big grin on my face
Damien Rice – Cannonball/Volcano and others
Another date with this James fella – we ended up stopping at Cheapo in St. Paul and I picked up a couple of CDs – Damien Rice – O and Jimmy Eat World – Bleed American. We drove around in my Altima with the windows down and Damien Rice blaring and I knew that I was in love
The Killers – Andy You’re a Star
Driving down highway 61 between Grand Marais and Duluth somewhere this song was on and I was driving and I looked over at James and he was sound asleep – for the first time in my life I felt a sense of completeness and security
My Chemical Romance – Helena
My first night as a wife driving down the strip in Las Vegas in a convertible with the top down with the love of my life right next to me and the rest of our life together ahead of us – all I really need to say :o)
Kenny Bristol – Jesus Paid it All
A Sunday morning a month or so before I had Rory I remember just closing my eyes and singing and the tears just falling because she started moving around and I just felt so full of love
Lullaby Land – Extractor Fan
Many, many nights I would listen to this blaring in our bedroom with Rory finally asleep in the bassinet next to our bed – I don’t know what we would have done without this track – it kept us sane. James and I would always joke about this being our favorite song.
Matt Nathanson – Still
I listened to this driving home from class last Tuesday after presenting our business plan and finally feeling a sense of relief. I was driving down 62 with my windows open even though it was a little bit cold - I just felt perfect peace and happiness and started to remember just how much I love music and the feelings, memories and emotions that it evokes within me. It really is my drug of choice.
Great post! I like your thoughts on Sabbath. I was listening to Andy Stanley at North Point Church this morning and he was talking about when God first told the Israelites to take a Sabbath and how it was an act of trusting God in a time when people HAD to work just to eat and get things done. In that time, God told them to rest and trust that He would complete whatever needed to be done.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Bethany. I'll have to listen to that message. I've heard it taught that way before as well, but I completely forgot about that. It is very true because normally I wouldn't have felt like I could take the time to sit and relax, but yesterday I was able to get everything done and feel comfortable taking a break. Hope you are doing well!
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