Today was the Pride parade in Minneapolis. I wasn't able to make it out to the parade, but wanted to let those celebrating know that I love them and am with them. But there is always that one person that wants to try to use it as a moment to condemn the entire LGBTQ+ community all to hell.
I have to have loads of grace for people like that, because I was once one of those people. But five years ago God changed my heart after I witnessed the church condemning someone who needed to be loved. I was extremely conflicted and depressed as a result and completely doubting my faith.
I spent a little over a year praying that God would help me understand how I was supposed to continue to be part of a church or religion that would tell someone they weren't welcome because they were too broken. After all, I was equally as broken, I just did a better job of concealing it. If they weren't welcome, then I wasn't either.
I heard God speak to me one particularly dark day through John 4 and a sermon by Jonathan Martin called Everything I've Ever Done. I listened to that sermon as I was on the treadmill and I ended up having to stop because I was crying so hard. God clearly told me "This is what you were praying for". Since that day, God started the process of deconstructing everything I ever knew about church and religion and rebuilding it on Jesus.
My belief was built on rules and trying to be good enough to win salvation. I never felt loved by Jesus, I never knew my own worth, until that day.
There are many verses I could throw out, but I won't do that, because that isn't what I'm trying to do here. I'm just trying to explain how I ended up where I am today.
Once I learned that Jesus is our advocate
My dear children, I write this to you so that you will not sin. But if anybody does sin, we have an advocate with the Father—Jesus Christ, the Righteous One. He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for ours but also for the sins of the whole world. 1 John 2:1-2 (NIV)It was a game changer for me.
Loved people, love people. Free people, free people. That is who I want to be.
Love is the most powerful force in the world. Love is the only thing that has the power to change the world. Jesus was able to speak to the Samaritan woman the way he did because he is Jesus. He has the ability to look into someone's eyes and make them see and feel loved....he always lead with love.
I believe so strongly that for one human to judge another or an entire group of humans without even having the chance to sit down and talk to them, and even then, is the most damaging and corrosive form of sin there is, and I believe this is Biblical.
Genesis 2:16-17 says
And the Lord God commanded the man, “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die.”
This knowledge of good and evil is the desire to be like God. The desire to decide who is good and who is bad. The desire to judge. But we're merely human. We weren't made for that. We don't have the knowledge of every single person. We don't know their history, we don't know their struggles, we didn't knit them together in their mother's womb, we simply don't have the capacity to judge because we don't have the capacity to know them like only their creator can.
The only person you are capable of judging and knowing is yourself. So if you think to extend that judgement to another person, I'm gonna have to ask you to go back and read Genesis 2 again. Then go ahead and read 1 Timothy 1:12-17 and see how Paul, who I think we can all argue is probably one of the most favored people in history, approached sin.
If you aren't willing to examine your own sin and view yourself as the worst of sinners, and understand your own capacity for needing grace, then please, just sit yourself down and keep your mouth shut because you aren't going to be doing anyone any favors. You aren't going to help anyone, you're just going to hurt people.
Trust me when I say that I don't take my affirming stance towards LGBTQ+ people lightly. The absolute last thing I would ever want to do is lead someone astray. But I believe with everything in me, so strongly that I'd be willing to put my own salvation on the line for it, that the way to show up to them and EVERY SINGLE PERSON IN THIS WORLD, is with love. Love, mercy and patience are the only way.
You know who has the complete power to change a heart and will do it at the exact right time? Jesus. So I'm going to love like Him and trust that He will do the rest. Jesus is the only person who has ever been able to change my heart. Yes, he has used others to help get me there, but it has always been out of a love for him and a love for others that the message has been able to reach me.
Clearly, the judgement and condemnation of the LGBTQ community has been doing far more harm than good up until this point. I mean, just look at these statistics from the Trevor project
- Suicide is the 2nd leading cause of death among young people ages 10 to 24.1
- LGB youth seriously contemplate suicide at almost three times the rate of heterosexual youth.2
- LGB youth are almost five times as likely to have attempted suicide compared to heterosexual youth.2
- Of all the suicide attempts made by youth, LGB youth suicide attempts were almost five times as likely to require medical treatment than those of heterosexual youth.2
- Suicide attempts by LGB youth and questioning youth are 4 to 6 times more likely to result in injury, poisoning, or overdose that requires treatment from a doctor or nurse, compared to their straight peers.2
- In a national study, 40% of transgender adults reported having made a suicide attempt. 92% of these individuals reported having attempted suicide before the age of 25.3
- LGB youth who come from highly rejecting families are 8.4 times as likely to have attempted suicide as LGB peers who reported no or low levels of family rejection.4
- 1 out of 6 students nationwide (grades 9–12) seriously considered suicide in the past year. [5]
- Each episode of LGBT victimization, such as physical or verbal harassment or abuse, increases the likelihood of self-harming behavior by 2.5 times on average.6
If you can read through this without weeping, then I would sincerely ask that you check your heart. Why would you show up with anything other than love and grace to people who are already hurting enough to take their own lives?
I'm no stranger to hating myself. Maybe that is why it is easier for me to put myself in their shoes. I know how much I've felt like a failure because I'm fat, or too emotional, or incapable of making and keeping friends. Those thoughts run through my head every damn day. If I had people telling me on top of that that I was damned to hell because I wanted to be who God made me to be, then there is no way I'd have the hope to continue on. I'd be done, I wouldn't have the strength to carry on. Where would the hope be?
So today I celebrate my friends who have had the ability to realize that they weren't able to live the life that God desired for them by suppressing who they actually are and instead decided to live into it and be proud of it.
Do you have any idea what that must have cost some of them? Do you have any idea how difficult it still must be? They should be nothing other than proud, because they live every damn day with more courage than most of us will ever know.
So to my friends who are out there and are living life as a proud LGBTQ community members, know that you are loved. I love you, simply for being who you are, a beautiful person created in God's image. Some people will try to convince you otherwise, but I am confident that Jesus loves you and you are not outside the arms of his grace and mercy, even if others have lead you to believe that. Nothing, and I mean nothing, can separate you from the love of God. It is fierce and it is wild and it will come find you, and I pray that it does.
I understand that you might not want it, because frankly, if I were in your shoes, I'd be really hesitant to want to grab onto something that looks as ugly as many people have been to you, but it is beautiful and powerful and worth it and if you ever want to join a community where you will be loved and accepted just as you are, you let me know, I've got one for you.
For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,8:38 Or nor heavenly rulers neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:38-39)To all my gay friends, my life is richer and fuller because of you and I am proud to know each and every one of you. I know I'm just one person and that probably doesn't do too much to mend the bruises that have accumulated over the years, but I needed you to know.
